Getting your wisdom teeth out is somewhat of a rite of passage for most teens, although a small percentage don’t need to have them removed. The process usually starts by putting the patient into an anesthetized fog, ensuring that they don’t feel anything throughout the procedure. It also takes a while to wear off afterward, which makes post-operative dental work a great time to video tape a loopy loved one feeling the effects of anesthesia. Dozens of videos of teens and adults mumbling incoherently after having their wisdom teeth removed have been posted to YouTube, some with viral status among internet videos. Below, we’ve narrowed it down to the best seven for your enjoyment.
I’m a Wizard!
After getting her wisdom teeth removed, a teenage girl comes to believe that she is a wizard attending Hogwarts. Distressed, she rationalizes that she had forgotten about it because the dentists who removed her wisdom teeth had put her under a spell. The girl is somewhat difficult to understand, since she spends a lot of the video talking in a squeaky, high-pitched voice combined with a mouth full of gauze. Thankfully, her mother seems to be able to translate back the most hilarious bits, such as how she plans to get revenge on the nurses with her invisible light sabers. There is a part II available on YouTube if you haven’t gotten enough of this wizard teen.
Brother and Sister Dental Odyssey
The only thing better than a video of someone yammering on nonsensically after a wisdom teeth extraction is a video of two people after a wisdom teeth extraction. This brother and sister duo are chronicled on their journey home from the dentist, puffy-faced and dealing with the residual effects of anesthesia. The brother is the louder of the two and carries on with a roller coaster of emotions, oscillating from awe that he doesn’t appear to recognize his sibling, to anger that he’s been “stabbed in the funny bone with a sword” where they put the IV in, to crying because he loses a thumb war to his sister. He spontaneously plays air guitar and asks both his sister and mother to marry him. Meanwhile, the sister sits in a calm, medicated stupor, her eyes half-lidded. The mother, who is somehow simultaneously driving and filming the pair, laughs at her children’s’ antics.
The Unicorn Rider
What is it with teens high on wisdom tooth anesthesia and thinking unicorns exist? Something in the medication must induce dreams dealing with the horned mythical creatures of lore. A teen wakes up from her wisdom tooth surgery and alludes to a fantastical journey that she went on while asleep. With gauze stuffed in her mouth, she explains, “I feel like a unicorn just took me on a ride to a magical palace to the land of the blueberries.” She goes on to describe what they eat in the so-called land of blueberries — onions, mushrooms, and the lucky papaya or two. After this, she breaks into a gospel-like cheer for “JC.” The teen’s name is Hannah Manry, and her hilarious video actually got her onto the Ellen DeGeneres show. As a guest star, she explained that she had no real interest in unicorns.
They Put Me in A Shampoo Bottle
A young girl has her wisdom teeth removed and is very alert, albeit somewhat delirious from the drugs. She appears to think that her operation took place at NASA; her teeth are that valuable. She reasons that these mad NASA scientists extracted her wisdom teeth by stuffing her into a shampoo bottle and shaking it around violently. Likewise, she must have seen the previous video on our list because she keeps thinking that Ellen DeGeneres is in the room and will pop out at any given moment. True to form in all wisdom teeth aftermath videos, she feels her mouth and lips and is overcome with concern that something is wrong with her tongue. At first, she fears that it’s been chopped off. Later, she sees the gauze in the rear-view mirror of the car and thinks her tongue has been bleached white. Her mother and friend standing by barely need to engage her in conversation to get hilarious results. The video is full of excellent one-liners and moments that will have you hunched over in laughter. Apparently, this video got enough views to attract Ellen’s attention as well, as she was also a guest star on the Ellen DeGeneres show.
Trouble Eating Pudding
After having your wisdom teeth removed, not only do you drool on yourself, repeatedly run your hands over your lips, and spout off all kinds of ridiculous, malformed sentences, but your coordination also severely declines. In this video, a boy attempts, and fails, to eat pudding after having his wisdom teeth removed. He continually brings spoonful after spoonful to his lips, either doesn’t open his mouth or misses his mouth entirely, and smears pudding all over his lips and chin. It just goes to show how difficult it is to engage in the basic activity of eating when you’re drugged up from pain killers; often he gets the pudding to his lips and stops short, as if uncertain how to continue the act. His mother laughs at his expense and shovels pudding off of his face. Worse, she offers him a pad to wipe his mouth with. Clean or not, I’d opt to have pudding on my face before wiping off with a sanitary napkin.
Are You Gonna Take Advantage Of Me?
A man talks to his wife after having his wisdom teeth removed, and speaks all kinds of glorious gibberish. Like most post-wisdom teeth extraction patients, he feels his lips and tongue and complains that his lips feel like “they’re in super glue.” She asks what he thinks they should give him for doing so well and he responds, “A skateboard!” Something about anesthesia seems to increase a sense of childlike wonder in people. While his wife laughs hysterically, the man goes on to describe a dream sequence that he had while under anesthesia in which he was on a farm, tending to cows. However, the cows were not satisfied with his care because he didn’t provide the correct kind of cereal. The man can’t seem to keep his eyes open or focus on anything in particular, which his wife also finds delightfully funny. When she tells him that he’ll go home and sleep for four to six hours, his eyes widen and he asks, “Are you going to take advantage of me?”
I Thought I Won a Lot of Money
This video is debatably the best on the list in terms of longevity. At just more than nine minutes, it is humorous for the entire length of the clip and you’re compelled to keep watching out of sheer laughter. This talkative teen comes out of her wisdom teeth stupor positive that she’s won enough money in Las Vegas to buy a house. She touches at her lips, makes a face, and says, “I don’t like this cotton in my mouth. It doesn’t taste like cotton candy anymore.” And what wisdom tooth experience would be complete without mention of a fantasy land with unicorns? She explains to the nurse that she, indeed, has 12 unicorns in Ireland, which is not so many but they’re “really rare, almost extinct,” and is then very distressed when she realizes that she has never fed them even though they need to eat every day. With an ice pack around her face, she makes comical expressions and worries that her swollen lips have come to resemble Angelina Jolie’s.